Dear Abby,
My husband has a long record of money problems. He runs up huge credit-card 
bills and at the end of the month, if I try to pay them off, he shouts at me, 
saying I am stealing his money. He says pay the minimum and let our kids worry 
about the rest, but already we can hardly keep up with the interest. Also he has 
been so arrogant and abusive toward our neighbors that most of them no longer 
speak to us. The few that do are an odd bunch, to whom he has been giving a lot 
of expensive gifts, running up our bills even more. Also, he has gotten 
religious. One week he hangs out with Catholics and the next with people who say 
the Pope is the Anti-Christ, and the next he's with Muslims. Finally, the 
last straw. He's demanding that before anyone can be in the same room with him, 
they must sign a loyalty oath. It's just so horribly creepy! Can you help? 
Signed, Lost
 
Dear Lost, 
Suck it up and stop whining, Michelle. You're getting to live in the White 
House for free, travel the world, and have others pay for everything for you. 
You can divorce the jerk any time you want. The rest of us are stuck with the 
idiot for 4 more years. 
Signed, Abby